14 November 2008

I almost died. reallly.

In all the CPR, First Aid, Lifeguarding types of classes, the instructors always say that when someone is choking to not touch them, but to say 'keep coughing' until they cannot cough anymore. at which point you proceed to do the Heimlich. I remember one class in particular going over the 'keep coughing' rule so much that my friend and I ended up laughing so hard whilst making fun of the teacher that we were asked to leave and come back when we could behave.

so with that in mind, I starting choking today. I was walking, well more like speed walking at a pace that was almost a jog, back to the office. I was eating some carrots as I tend to be impatient and I simply couldn’t wait until I got back to work to start eating them. So here I am, speed walking along the street, stuffing my mouth full of raw carrots. Then I tripped. just a little trip, the kind where you have a stumble but managed to regain your footing without any embarrassment or notice. Well, the trip was the final straw. I couldn’t chew, swallow and catch myself all at the same time. I started to choke. I was coughing and coughing, apparently making quite a scene as several people turned to look. Then, to my horror, I realised the carrot was really stuck and I couldn’t cough anymore!! I was just gasping. I freaked out, as I do, and instead of remaining calm and thinking of something logical I started trying to cough as hard as I could while turning in a circle. The circle bit was probably not conscience movement, but I ended up doing it all the same.

I have a small crowd gathered about by this time. I am still trying to cough while turning in a circle and pointing at my throat. After what seems like hours, but was probably only about 30 seconds, a man realises I am choking and comes over to help. "are you ok?" asks man. In my head i respond "WHKNASFIOHT!!!, does it look like I am ok? I am choking on a freakin' carrot here!! if I cant even cough how the heck do you think I am going to respond to you?" Instead, I keep attempting to cough...only this time I succeed. I cough and up comes the carrot. half chewed and pretty slobbery, the carrot hits the man in the face. To make it worse, bits of carrot even came out of my nose! the crows wanders away, I thank said man for helping and apologise profusely for spitting my lunch on him. He says no worries and walks off. I continue my walk back to the office, albeit at a somewhat slower pace than before. And for some strange reason, in spite of all of the hassle and near death experience, I continued to eat carrots as I walked.


Sohailah said...

OH my word! You are hilarious and I loved it! Was that friend Laurel? Love you!

Sean and Shey said...

Um, I really hope its ok that I was laughing a bit at this story.... :-) But of course I'm glad you're ok!! Man, what an eventful lunch!!! Oh! I just forgot that I haven't emailed you my number yet... I will!