2 January 2012

2011 Reflections

Happy New Year! The end of 2011 resulted in some pretty sporadic blogging as 'morning' sickness and moving took over my life. And even though the year has technically already wrapped up, I did not want to officially end 2011 on my blog until I did some year end blogging.

I ended 2010 with Reverb. 31 days, 31 posts- all reflecting on 2010 and looking forward to 2011. I went back through today and read those. It was interesting, funny, heartbreaking and humbling to read some of the posts. 2010 was a hard year. A lot of what I hoped for 2011 came true. and a lot didnt. But I am glad I had such a record.

So whilst I did not 'reverb' everyday in December, I am going to do a summed up version the next three days. Then on the fourth day I will post my goals for 2012. Then 2011 can be wrapped and the blog can officially welcome in the new year.

So without further ado, let Reverb 11 begin:

1.Where did 2011 begin?
The in-laws house. Lots of party food, wii games, dance party with the adults when the little ones went to bed, lots of drinks, lots of laughs, a quick skip over to the pub and a good time was had by all!

2.Who did you meet?
Gosh...lots of people. We moved in April and had to start over in a new country, a new city. Thanks to the graciousness of Tim and Ally, we met and were welcomed into an amazing church.

3.What books did you read?
Positive Discipline, Help your Baby talk, So Long Insecurity, Radical (I do not recommend that one), 12 Books that Changed the Word, and I feel like there might have been a few more....

4.When did you struggle?
I am not sure that I can fully answer that one. I struggled A LOT. 2010 was difficult, but 2011 proved to be no walk in the park. I struggled leaving Europe. I struggled moving back to Tulsa. I struggled letting myself make new friends and I struggled letting go of some of the old ones. I struggled living with my parents for 8 months. I struggled not having my own space. I am still struggling with not having a car and my own transportation. (hard to do in tulsa) I struggled investing in E the ways I wanted to. and then I struggled with guilt when I didnt. I struggled going back to the UK in October. and then I struggled leaving again. I struggled with getting pregnant. I struggled a lot. about a lot of things. a lot of the time.

5.What did you discover?
I discovered that life really is what I make of it. If I am negative- life sucks. IF I always point out the bad, then that is what I am going to get. I discovered that the opposite applies as well.

I discovered that I have even more of a tendency to be lazy that I thought. and if I am not careful, the day is easily wasted away.

I discovered that I am both stronger and more insecure than I thought.

6.Who was important to you?
First and foremost, Rhys. I am difficult. seriously. I cant imagine having to live with myself. Sometimes I step back and really think about what I just said or did and I am amazed that Rhys actually puts up with me. He is patient, kind, considerate and compassionate. I can say without reservation that I would not have made it through either 2010 or 2011 without him. He will never know just how important he is to me.

Also important in 2011: Katherine. without her in Brecon, well...it would have been even harder than it was. Allyson. Without her in Tulsa, I cant imagine what the transition would have been like.

7.What do you hope to remember?
I really hope to remember the gratefulness felt when we finally got our own space in December. (yup, barely made it in 2011) It was such a long wait, and such a hard wait, that the feeling was so incredibly sweet. To us our place is HUGE! after our tiny flat, which was the last place Rhys, E and I lived that was just us, that our house may as well be a mansion. I mean come on, you can NOT touch all the kitchen walls at the same time. Or sit on the toilet, with your feet in the bathtub whilst brushing your teeth in the sink. Our place is massive :)

And we are so grateful. I don't want to lose that feeling. I don't want to get caught up in what we do or don't have. I don't want to start thinking "oh we need to do this to the house and buy this or that" I want to live in that appreciation we first felt. I don't want to lose that feeling.

And that is it for today. More tomorrow as I try and wrap up the year in my head and prepare for the new year ahead.

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